Conscience

Friends,

As someone who thinks a good deal about reconciliation, I keep seeking common threads we all share so I can work amidst the serious divides in our culture. Our Civility First work has been an important attempt at societal reconciliation from a socio-political and ultimately a personal perspective. In the midst of so much moral equivocating, rationalizing and just lying, I also decided to think a bit more deeply about what forms and guides our moral and ethical principles in the first place, and my thoughts have led me to the slippery and sly word of conscience.

Our conscience can lead us to both good and evil, and it can be quite deceptive, but essentially it is where our “better angels” reside as gyroscopes for helping us decide right and wrong.. “How can someone in good conscience say or do those things?” we ask. Or perhaps more importantly, we need to also ask, “How can I say or do this thing in good conscience myself?” In general we know our conscience to be a sort of “moral muscle” that maintains its strength through the life-long discipline and exercise of our values and principles as we seek to know what is the right thing to do amidst all of life’s complexities.

The root of the word conscience comes from Latin's conscientia, or "with knowing." Which begs the question “With knowing what?” How do we know what is right and wrong? Is our conscience formed by something like the “scientific method” of experiments and validations of our daily ethical lives that teach us what seems most intuitively right and true for us? But don’t we also need to “know with” a standard beyond our own intuition? What are the standards of right and wrong that also must guide our ethical lives, and how many of these are we likely to share in common, at least in part, with those with a different ethical orientation? It would be important to ask.

If I were to ask each of us what experiences in your life have most affected your sense of conscience, what examples might we come up with? Perhaps the most likely answer will refer to a role model in your life that you deeply respect, especially someone with a strong sense of admirable ethical standards and a “clear conscience". This approach, of course can work both ways. Our conscience can be as easily influenced by the scoundrels that impact our lives as well as the saints. Whoever these role models are, they are likely to be someone who has overcome enough difficult decisions in life to have defined perimeters of right and wrong behavior, and we find ourselves interested in emulating them. We are fortunate, as I certainly have been, if we have had role modes in our lives with a high level integrity and “clear conscience” who inspire us to a similar level of integrity.

A related question then is: “What do you consider the primary moral and ethical guidelines in your life. Most of us would reference some classical biblical or moral teachings that have helped us “know with” what is right. The all-time standard, of course, cited in some form in most all religious teachings, is the Golden Rule: “Do unto others and you would have them do unto you” as it  it evokes our  sense of caring and empathy which is the heart of a strong conscience.

So how might we engage with those who seem to have such a different moral conscience?

We probably need to begin with asking: "What has formed our own conscience, and how do we continue to keep it “clear?" Can we be sure enough about our own judgement of right and wrong to “in good conscience" judge the conscience of others, especially if we know little about them? I am not referring here to the hard core ideologue, but more to the difficult family member or neighbor or colleague. It is an interesting perspective to ask what is the basis of his/her conscience and how and why is it different or similar to mine?

If we were to have a conversation with such a person, what might we ask? In the course of casual or planned conversation, for example, we might ask about the role models in their life? What was the most important thing you learned about how to relate to other people and how to gain respect? Do you have a favorite saying when you are faced with a difficult or confusing decision? We might well be surprised by the answers, one way or another, but whatever the answer, it would be a window into their conscience and a good place to open up a relationship, especially if I am asked in return to share my answers to those questions.

I know my musings and suggestions are only tangential in terms of reconciling our enormous differences across our various current divides. But I like to think they are a start. By maintaining our own conscience with the aspiration of keeping a “clear conscience" through a spirit of spiritual attentiveness we may well be able to reach out to the consciences of those with whom we may disagree. I would like to think  our “moral muscle” of conscience somehow will be an important part of the reconciliation process before us, guided by respectful and conscientious  love.

Peace,

Tom