Trust

Friends,

The most common public association with Quakers is with Quaker Oats or Quaker Oil. The interesting part of that identification is that neither were, nor are, Quaker owned products. The publicists for the initial Quaker Mill Company needed to assure the public they could trust their rolled oats product and called their otherwise nondescript and potentially corruptible product Quaker Oats because Quakers had a noted reputation for honesty and trust. I’d like think we Quakers deserved that trust then and now, but rather than associate us with oats and oil, I would rather be associated with trusting our peace testimony, our history of social justice advocacy, and humane service! 

Surely one of the most important foundational words and concepts in our social life is the matter of trust. Trust is formally defined as an "assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, integrity, or truth of someone or something.” That criteria now lands with a heavy thud given the reality of our current leadership. Our whole nation is now plagued with dishonesty, deceit, or just incompetence that destroys trust. And our pervasive distrust encompasses and compromises so much of our institutional, corporate, governmental life, even the scientific community. What a heartbreak when we can’t trust each other! How can we work together if our personal and communal relationships and respect for our foundational institutions are suspect and distrusted? That’s the reality for most of us who are struggling with some level of distrust in this era of such lies and a lack of commitment to the common good.

So, having attempted to name the erosion of trust that plagues us, I need now to turn to what we can do to reestablish trust, beginning with our personal lives. Sociology researcher Joe Folkman, in his book The Trifecta of Trust, names three major factors that build and hold trust: relationships, consistency, and expertise. 

Relationships refers to everything from a shared smile at the supermarket to developing trusting relationships with family, friends and co-workers through assurance of mutual respect and integrity. A society of trusting relationships means that life is safer, more manageable, and rewarding. Folkman notes that the quality of relationships is the most important of the three qualities of trust he identifies.

Consistency is another aspect of building trust. Can I trust someone to consistently be on time, meet their responsibilities, and are dependable friends and neighbors? Of course, we allow for inconsistencies as well, but the steadiness of relationships in general is an essential element of trust.

And finally, expertise. I think, of course, of our choice of doctors, teachers, service providers, or advisors. In general one of the most important qualifications we seek in referrals is how competent a person is at their role in life. We want a daycare provider or a plumber to “know their business” and express confidence in the ability and commitment to the task. We trust those most who fulfill these expectations.

Most of us apply these three qualities of trust on an everyday basis. We personally also want to fulfill these expectations to establish our personal trust from others. 

Now back to the larger question of systemic distrust seemingly beyond our personal control, particularly the present Trump administration. In a democratic society we are expected to assume that our individual and communal voices will be heard through fair elections. Or we have the right to challenge and protest those policies and behavior that violate our rights and dignity. And our often complacent voices are indeed coming alive as the current administration has become even more violent and disrespectful of our Constitutional rights. And may it continue to be so. Our hope to recover our democratic government is in our ability to develop a cooperative movement that both resists and offers a better alternative. Although I have been quite discouraged at times this past year, I am currently impressed that our nation is becoming more alive and assertive. And I am deeply encouraged when I see the local and national crowds that are expressing our resistance and hopes.

I close with my personal belief that ultimately the power of love and compassion will conquer the forces of fear, evil and hatred in the world. This is my ultimate act of trust.

Peace,
Tom